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"I Lost My Ability for Faith to Make Sense" with Spiritual Director Grace Cabalka

There comes a moment in many of our lives when the faith we once held with certainty begins to shift. The language that once felt alive starts to feel distant. And the ways we used to connect with God stop working the same way.

 In this conversation with spiritual director with Grace Cabalka, we explore what it can look like to walk through a spiritual wilderness — and to not just to survive it, but to be transformed by it. Grace shares her own story of a crisis of faith, the role of community in this season of shattering, and the personal practices and postures that became good companions along the way.

Together, we talk about the slow, tender work of listening, leaning into vulnerability, and learning to make space for the mystery of God in new ways. Listen in.

Thought-provoking quotes:

"For a long time, Taylor, I couldn't read the Bible. I couldn't pray because I didn't have words. So I literally would just go get in my chair, my brown leather chair that I still have it and sit in there in the morning. And I couldn't have my quiet time. I just didn't have the tools. They were all broken. And so I just would sit there and say, Lord, I'm here." - Grace Cabalka

"My foundation wasn't as solid as I thought it was. And I didn't get wiped away, but I did crumble. And then that had to be rebuilt really on the foundation of love and acceptance, and that God is for me all the time and nothing can ever separate us from his love ever, ever, ever. And that's what drives us and motivates us. That's what Paul said. His love is what compels me. Not the guilt, not the shame, not the rules, but his love." - Grace Cabalka

"I think that there can be easier ways to get through the wilderness if you can find a hand to hold, find someone to walk with you along with the Holy Spirit. But those first few moments and days and weeks are very dark and it's very scary and it's very lonely. And I would just encourage you to just show up to those emotions, show up to yourself, and don't shame yourself for it. You've done nothing wrong." - Grace Cabalka